Friday, June 01, 2007

Elderly Gamer Promotion



Dressing Seamus in the Elf costume hasn't managed to draw any extra visitors. So inspired by the machinations of Deitrix, and following prolonged negotiation, the elderly gamer is proud to introduce Olga, a new promotional aid for the elderly gamer.

elderly: Do I read this bit?
Seamus: yes that's her bio!
elderly: here you read I've forgotten my glasses
Seamus: (cough!) Olga was born in Render City in Virtuania and is 23 years of age. She lives with her mother and is currently pursuing a career in game fmv modeling. Olga is between jobs right now and loves nothing better than taking long walks in the countryside with her pet rhinoceros Josephine.
elderly: That can't be right?
Seamus: look she wrote it, it must be right.... stop interrupting (Cough!).
Olga likes reading, riding and watching football, her favourite pastime is bending isometric rods and she likes the feel of cold graphic tablets against her skin, one of...
elderly: stop! she what?
Seamus: she likes the feel of..
elderly: Stop!, I've heard enough, basically Olga is here to model our new range of elderly gamer virtual clothing, unfortunately she only agreed to one pose and refused to remove her jacket. Essentially if numbers increase you'll get to see more of her....
(whispers) I can't believe I've stooped to this level to draw visitors...
Seamus: It says here she's single and is interested in virtual relationships....
(elderly grabs bio from Seamus)
Seamus: I think I'm in love.....
elderly:Sigh!

Clickable inkies

16 comments:

fatherkrishna said...

*Wolf whistles...*
WOW! Olga's hot! You see Elderly? Seamus does have some good ideas! Now if we could only see some screenshots of her riding the rhinocerous...

And please! More of the biography... we need to know more!

Genius... Sheer bloody genius!

The Elderly said...

...wait you want to see Olga riding her rhinoceros? well that would be a talking point.... well if you think it might drum up some interest in the site..... I dunno

Seamus the Leprechaun said...

Hiya Fk thanks for the comment, I knew this would be a strong seller... plus I don't have to wear those ridiculous tights anymore... I'll write to her..

...I wonder how we'd transport a virtual Rhino all the way to Ireland... but where theres a will theres a way..

cmon elderly whadda ya say.. Olga on her Rhino....

The Elderly said...

..I dunno, what if the Rhino gets unruly.... breaks something....

fatherkrishna said...

When I say "riding her rhino..." I mean travelling on the back of it... Not... *COUGH!* Jeez! Did you think I meant...

Jeez! Seamus! Get your tights back on... I need a distraction...

The Elderly said...

.. travelling on the back, got it... not .... ?

THUD!

Seamus the Leprechaun said...

...oh dear poor mr.elderly... not for a handful shamrock blessed by St.Patrick himself will you catch me wearing those tights again... I'm a bit confused about the riding bit though, perhaps someone could explain it to me....

gnome said...

Excellent work, hilarious post, nice leprechaun, love the teats...

The Elderly said...

Teats.... (panics....) where?

Seamus the Leprechaun said...

(points at the two protruberances on Olga.... )

those there... look pointing out through her t-sh....

WHACkkkkkkkk .... ouch what was that for?

The Elderly said...

..dont' make it obvious.. no one mention the ... the... points....

....damn damn damn.. .why didn't i spot them....

gnome said...

They are more cunning than we believed them to be...

The Elderly said...

Im convince they weren't there when i took the photographs.... they must have grown.. overnight...

..maybe it's mould.. mounds... or stuff...

DEITRIX said...

.... she looks pretty built.. like she could kick some arse.

gnome said...

Or take it up... uh... yes, cunning they are. Definitely.

The Elderly said...

Yes an impressive lady, and quite... reasonable as well....

Gnome.....(mouth opens in shock....)

though i would imagine not that reasonable.....

...unfortunately i've heard no reply from her agent since Seamus sent her naked photos of himself......