Saturday, June 30, 2007

Vampire Rain (Xbox 360) meta Review


Your mission, to eliminate a growing population of deadly vampires on your own or, with up to eight players online where you have the choice to remain a human or become a Nightwalker. Though with a score of 56% from 5 reviews on Metacritic.com, you may decide to visit your granny instead.

Reviews Summary
It's kitsch. Deep kitsch, ludicrously incongruous, over-the-top voiceovers
A very mediocre game you might consider this one a rainy day at the bargain bin
Decent stealth elements and a fun Live play can't quite redeem what is a deeeply shoddy game.
As the back of the box says: Identify (that the game's a bit rubbish). Eliminate (it off your shopping list). Survive (with your dignity intact).
Feels like it's from 1997 and not 2007?

Eurogamer Review (3/10)
Screenshots from IGN
Japanese Website
English Website

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Thursday, June 28, 2007

The Darkness Review (xbox 360, Ps3)


Dark modern crime drama and supernatural horror with intense first person non-linear gameplay scores well with averages of 83% for xbox360 and 85% for Ps3, from Metacritic.com

Xbox 360 Summary
The Darkness delivers on every level.
The game's biggest problem is all the filler between the reasonably exciting combat sequences.
A remarkable action game that tells a compelling story from start to finish.
Worth checking out for its unusual ideas, twisted gameplay elements, and uniquely dark atmosphere. Draconian just-one-save system,
It's a stunning achievement, it's too bad that the AI and gameplay mechanics couldn't be smoothed out

Ps3 Summary
The best bits of mafia and war films, producing one complete, intriguing experience
The Darkness will keep you enthralled, even when the gameplay lags a little behind.
It’s like a great amusement park ride: fun while it lasts.
Some core problems hiding in the shadows, like underlying structure and play that just don’t completely congeal.
Amazing narrative, believability of characters, and the twisted joys that come from being a slave of a demon, impressive visual presentation.

Official Website

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Aya Brea 3d Cosplay


Aya Brea is a character from the Parasite Eve series of games published by Square, The first game (never released in the west) is a sequel to the novel "Parasite Eve", written by Hideaki Sena.

more images from Rendered Beauty

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Tuesday, June 26, 2007

Olga Says Hi


Seamus here!!!!!, Olga has asked that i post the following to all of you who were so good as to comment on her last photoshoot here on the elderly gamer. The following accompanied this beautiful postcard.

Hi to de regulars on the heatherly gamer, will soon return for de next photoshoot for mr.heatherly until then a big kiss for Gnume, Fither Crispa, Dutrex and doomload Minkey... I miss you guys... see you soon...

love

Olga...

....ahhhh I can't wait...

posted by the Leprechaun

Max Payne Film




Max Payne: Payne & Redemption is the third Chapter of a series of collective short films surrounding a foreboding tale set in the life and times of Max Payne. The film is in reality part three of six short films, which will eventually come together to form one feature length piece. Initially, it was written as a stand alone affair, but according to the producers, the potential story lines either side were too promising to pass up.

Official Website

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Tuesday, June 19, 2007

Resident Evil Extinction Wallpaper






The third and final installment "Resident Evil: Extinction", picks up where the last film left off.

Alice (Milla Jovovich), now in hiding in the Nevada desert, once again joins forces with Carlos Olivera (Oded Fehr) and L.J. (Mike Epps), along with new survivors Claire (Ali Larter), K-Mart (Spencer Locke) and Nurse Betty (Ashanti) to try to eliminate the deadly virus that threatens to make every human being undead... and to seek justice.

Since being captured by the Umbrella Corporation, Alice has been subjected to biogenic experimentation and becomes genetically altered, with super-human strengths, senses and dexterity. These skills, and more, will be needed if anyone is to remain alive. The film comes to cinemas September 21st.

Official Website
Trailer and behind the scenes Zombie clip
Wallpapers from Official Site and Dutchtilt Desktops

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Monday, June 18, 2007

Porn For Leprechauns Giantesses





Seamus here (Leprechaun) finally free from house arrest to wreak hav... to commemorate the installation of Father Krishna's Throne. For all my Leprechaun fans, and the Macrophilacs amongst you. . . . . it's good to be back!!

Ahhh i hear you say, wheres the video game connection? well here is a video i've kept, just specially for this occassion Voila! Demoliton Girl,



ahh yes video games, dealing with everything but nudity, speaking of which (nudity in videogaming), the Tomb Raider anniversary nude lara patch is available,

where?... well a certain mr.Gnome has been hiding it under his hat.

see all "Porn for Leprechauns" posts

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Saturday, June 16, 2007

Wednesday, June 13, 2007

DWar movie posters





Due for a Korean release August 2nd, D War stars Jason Behr and is Based on the Korean legend that unknown creatures will return and devastate the planet. Reporter Ethan Kendrick is called in to investigate the matter, and he arrives at the conclusion that a girl stricken with a mysterious illness named Sarah is suppose to help him. The Imoogi (the bad guy) makes its way to Los Angeles, wreaking havoc and destruction. With the entire city under arms, will Ethan and Sarah make it in time to save the people of Los Angeles? well to be honest....I don't know, neither do I know when we'll get a chance to see this over here, but from the trailer and the Artwork, hopefully soon.

the elderly gamer, previewing stuff you'll probably never see......

Trailer and posters from Official Website

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Monday, June 11, 2007

Elderly Goes Racing


Well more like tyre wall crashing, the above image is proof of my latest obsession, and by way of apology for my absence from regular posting of late. Also in part witness to the promotional opportunities of Forza Motorsport 2, (deftly spotted by Deitrix) if only i could stop crashing into people...

Atelier Iris 3 Review


Atelier Iris 3: Grand Phantasm, released in Japan as Atelier Iris: Grand Fantasm, though with a storyline unrelated to earlier releases. The rpg series where Alchemy forms an important aspect of the combat system. Scoring an average 63% from 17 reviews on Metacritic.com

Reviews Summary
Short (?), slightly repetitive in scope, and lacking a compelling plot
Atelier Iris 3 is a retro-infused, highly inspired classic.
The series is stagnating in gameplay that was obtusely old-fashioned ten years ago
A good basic RPG that isn't too deep, but still has an entertaining edge.
A
n epic adventure is hiding in here somewhere, but AI3 doesn't bother getting around to it till it's done boring you.
Capable of scratching that RPG itch with its enjoyable Afterworlds, innovative battle system, and exceptional soundtrack
Enough depth and charm to keep players involved for the entirety of its 40-plus hours.

Official Japanese Site

Official English Site
Screenshots (5) from IGN

see all recent Ps2 Reviews

Atelier 3 Walkthrough Links

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Friday, June 08, 2007

Hour of Victory (Xbox 360) Preview




A World War II shooter that takes players through the war from a number of different perspectives. Built using the Unreal Engine 3.0 and developed by Midway exclusively for the Xbox 360.

A secret factory hidden in the Bavarian Alps, the Nazis and a nuclear weapon. Featuring three distinct styles of play, stealth, sniper, and run-and-gun. Due for Release US June 18th and EU June 22nd

Hands on from IGN
Hands on from Gamepsot
Multiplayer hands on from Gamespot
Preview from 1up

Official Website

see all "Xbox 360" Previews

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Thursday, June 07, 2007

Big Brain Academy Wii Degree Preview


A "re-thinking" of the DS brain-training hit, where you ditch the stylus in favour of the Wii remote. The game boasts innovative use of Mii profiles and Wiiconnect24, in addition the title automatically imports all the friend codes stored on your Wii console,

Due US June 11th, Eu July 20th for Wii.

Hands on from IGN
Hands on from Gamespot
Preview from 1up

see all "Wii Previews"


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Wednesday, June 06, 2007

FIFA 08 (Xbox 360, Ps3) Preview

30 leagues, 620 teams 15,000 players and the new Be a Pro mode. Due Q3 2007 EU. Hands on, 4 screenies and video interview with EA Game Producer Joe Booth. Latest from IGN

due 9th October in US (thanks anonymous)

FIFA 08 Ps2 Reviews

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Saturday, June 02, 2007

The Five Faces of Lara,Tomb Raider Anniversary





To herald the release of Tomb Raider Anniversary, and inspired by the extraordinary Gametap Documentary available in the limited edition. Eidos through the years, has chosen one young lady to be Lara Croft, for your delectation the faces behind the ten years of Lara Croft.

top to bottom L to R

Nell McAndrew 1998-1999 / Lara Weller 1999-2000
Lucy Clarkson 2000-2002 / Jill De Jong 2002-2004
Karima Adebibe current
Models Anniversary Shoot



Left out (for reasons best known to themselves) they forgot about Rhona Mitra (whom I had forgotten about were it not for Shannon, Thank you Shannon!)


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Preview: Fantastic 4 Rise of the Silver Surfer




Fantastic Four: Rise of the Silver Surfer is a 2007 superhero film which is the sequel to the 2005 film Fantastic Four and based upon the comic of the same name.

To coincide with the movie release... yes you guessed it a multi-platform (always worrying..) game from Take Two Interactive and 7 studios. The game is set in the world of the upcoming film, but also draws from the pages of the comics for some extra story elements.

However the mediocre movie-licensed games spree may be at an end, well according to IGN. and 1up.

Due June 15th Eu and US on Nintendo DS, PlayStation 3, PlayStation 2, Xbox 360 and the kitchen sink.

Official Movie Website

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Friday, June 01, 2007

Elderly Gamer Promotion



Dressing Seamus in the Elf costume hasn't managed to draw any extra visitors. So inspired by the machinations of Deitrix, and following prolonged negotiation, the elderly gamer is proud to introduce Olga, a new promotional aid for the elderly gamer.

elderly: Do I read this bit?
Seamus: yes that's her bio!
elderly: here you read I've forgotten my glasses
Seamus: (cough!) Olga was born in Render City in Virtuania and is 23 years of age. She lives with her mother and is currently pursuing a career in game fmv modeling. Olga is between jobs right now and loves nothing better than taking long walks in the countryside with her pet rhinoceros Josephine.
elderly: That can't be right?
Seamus: look she wrote it, it must be right.... stop interrupting (Cough!).
Olga likes reading, riding and watching football, her favourite pastime is bending isometric rods and she likes the feel of cold graphic tablets against her skin, one of...
elderly: stop! she what?
Seamus: she likes the feel of..
elderly: Stop!, I've heard enough, basically Olga is here to model our new range of elderly gamer virtual clothing, unfortunately she only agreed to one pose and refused to remove her jacket. Essentially if numbers increase you'll get to see more of her....
(whispers) I can't believe I've stooped to this level to draw visitors...
Seamus: It says here she's single and is interested in virtual relationships....
(elderly grabs bio from Seamus)
Seamus: I think I'm in love.....
elderly:Sigh!

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